Lying in bed, A. and I got to talking, mostly because I'm getting very nervous about the first rabbi meeting. What if she doesn't like me? What if she thinks I'm not prepared?
I asked A. what questions I should ask - she told me to bring questions. Instead of providing me with questions, A. asked a question of his own, not that I should be surprised. He loves asking questions.
"Why do you want to become Jewish? We've never really talked about it."
And I clammed up. This is an extremely personal question, even when asked by my fiance and closest friend. And then I started to panic. What if my answer isn't good enough? And how are you supposed to answer something like that when it's more a pull, a feeling?
But you know what? In discussing such a personal thing with A., it really got me think about why I do want to become Jewish. And even though the conversation made me uncomfortable, it felt good to talk about this with A. and to work through my feelings. I know feel one step closer to becoming a Jew.
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